Hawaii and Puzzles

Right now it’s 3 am in Nashville. Right now it’s 10 pm on Kauai Island in Hawaii where I sit on our second floor covered deck typing this reflection. (I think my mind and body sit somewhere in between the two time zones, because right now I can’t sleep.) Right now I see a full moon in the sky to my left and the twinkling of white lights and tiki torches reflecting in the garden pond directly in front of me. Right now I hear the distant crashing of waves and rain drops falling on the palm trees that surround me (which has me a bit perplexed since I can see the moon.) Right now I know that the ocean is only three minutes walking distance from me. Right now I hear the distant voices of people laughing and celebrating a place where all that matters is “right now.” Right now I should be sleeping. But right now I can’t stop thinking about puzzle pieces and passages from a book I have been reading.

I’ll start with puzzle pieces. Just an ordinary part of a hobby older adults enjoy and children find delight in that I’ve started to view as more than just pieces to a puzzle. It first started when I noticed Farrah had a lone puzzle piece on the dash of her car this Christmas. Perplexed, I asked her why it was there. She told me how it was part of a sermon illustration at church regarding how we are all a piece of a larger masterpiece. I liked this example as I’ve always found fascination in stories and how everyone’s story points to the larger Story playing out each day. Lately my puzzling thoughts have been a bit more self-involved. I’ve been looking at circumstances from the past few months of my life. Thinking about dreams and hopes I have. Wondering if these circumstances are foreshadows to hopes being fulfilled. I started thinking about each of these different circumstances as a puzzle piece. As a child, my big brother (the puzzle master) taught me that when doing a puzzle to first lay out all the pieces face up, separate the edge pieces, and then display what the end product should look like. This method would ensure that constructing the puzzle would be as easy and efficient as possible. His advice always sticks with me, so in thinking about my circumstances and experiences, I started laying them out in my mind like individual puzzle pieces. I can’t see for certain what the end picture will look like, but each piece seems to compliment the others, they seem like they work well together, it looks like it has the potential to together make a beautiful picture. So why can’t I just put the pieces together NOW and enjoy the pretty picture? Did I get a couple of puzzles mixed up and I’m trying to fit together pieces that can never fit? Am I just missing some of the edge pieces that I need to wait for before the actual connecting of all the middle pieces can begin? Maybe all these questions were why I usually ended up leaving the puzzles to my brother…

On the plane ride to Hawaii, I finally had time to start reading a book I’ve wanted to read for months. We have the privilege of promoting it right now and the second I read the blurb about it; I knew it was a book I needed to read in full. It’s called anonymous jesus’ hidden years and yours by Alicia Britt Chole. This book echoes my thoughts about waiting and wondering about my puzzles pieces just sitting in front of me and has opened my eyes to many new insights. Have you ever thought about how so much of Jesus’ life on earth is undocumented? Almost 30 years of it. What was He doing in that time? Why did he have to wait so long to fulfill his purpose? Alicia makes some fascinating points/ideas on this subject of “hidden years.” She makes a profound statement that I’m still pondering: “Today’s decisions foreshadow tomorrow’s challenges and reflect yesterday’s choices.” Today matters, God doesn’t waste anyone’s time. Even Jesus needed those hidden years to prepare him for the 3 years he was in the spotlight and the decisions and challenges he would be faced with. As Alicia points out, we miss out on a huge piece of life when we discount “hidden years.” She says, “most of us struggle if our dreams are delayed one year, let alone twenty! We find God’s pauses perplexing. They seem to be a waste of our potential. When those pauses extend beyond what we can comprehend or explain (say, for instance, three days) we often spiral into self-doubt or second-guessing. But in anonymous seasons we must hold tightly to the truth that no doubt strengthened Jesus throughout his hidden years: Father God is neither care-less nor cause-less with how he spends our lives. When he calls a soul simultaneously to greatness and obscurity, the fruit—if we wait for it—can change the world.”

I could include about 10 more quotes, but I’ll just let you read the book yourself, it’s worth it.

I definitely feel like I have yet to reach my full potential and long to have my days full of only what I’m passionate about: things like loving people one by one and doing whatever it takes to encourage them to live life fully and to their greatest capacity. It’s easy to just say “well, that doesn’t pay the bills right now,” but I’m pretty sure that’d just be an excuse. I’m pretty sure I can be living out that passion now while also recognizing so much of life is about the process and the daily lessons of once again putting Christ in the center. Someday living out that passion might be “easier.” There is a purpose in the puzzling moments that have filled my mind lately though. And you know what, God didn’t call us to try to figure out what he’s doing all the time, but to trust Him and surrender and let Him lead us. It’s all about the relationship.


So why is it so hard to live in the “right now?” Tonight as I sit in the middle of paradise on earth thinking about puzzle pieces, I will remind myself once again that all my little puzzle pieces are preparing me for the purpose God has for me. I can be certain they will fit together to make a picture more beautiful than the scenery I have seen the past few days. I will remind myself once again that I am one small piece in a much grander story. And I will be able to sleep now, knowing the Master will fit all the pieces together at just the right moment, saying “My child, the time is now.” Paradise awaits.